Relationships… Such a big word… What’s the first thing you think about when you hear the word Relationships? Love… Romance… Sex? Well, that is exactly what we think. We want to experience the long walks on the beach, watching the sun set, falling asleep in the loving arms of our partner. Long road trips, drinking beer and having sex in the car, we want that!
However, it is not always like that in reality. Media and TV shows have made an invincible fairytale image of what relationships should be like and in reality its not. As a result, we often feel that our relationships lack some oomph, and we become unhappy. Some are more realistic, but others aren’t, especially the younger ones. In turn, the relationship leads into a bad one because two parties feel that they are not enough and the pressure for the need to satisfy is not met. What happens is that, you try to become someone else, and this is where the worst things begin. Once you do this, it is almost always that you turn into someone bad—someone you’re not. I am not saying that this is the only reason for breakups, but this certainly is a start. To make my point very clear, I like to state an example. Imagine a couple who frequently go out on dates, watch movies, and stroll on the beach and all that kind of stuff. As their relationship grew older, they stopped doing it (this is normal). Now, they tend to disagree a lot, you fight and you break up. After a few days, you get back together, you have break up sex and you get breakfast in bed for a week. This eventually becomes a routine and along the way, you get tired of it. You get tired of the patterns and you ultimately want to get out. Sometimes, people cheat because of the need for something better. This is how it affects relationships.
Things To Do To Recover From a Bad Relationship
In this kind of crappy relationship, one person always wants to hold on. There is always one who wants to preserve the relationship in hopes that it could be restored of its former glory. Desperately trying to hold on, he/she changes themselves just to please their partner even if they are not happy. Eventually, the relationship is bound to end and you are left desperate and hurt. So, in order to help you here are some tips for you to recover from a bad break up.
1. Don’t Commit Suicide
If you are very depressed and desperate, suicide might come to your mind. I’m telling you this is a bad idea. There are a lot of people out there who are far better than your previous partner. As they say, there are a lot of fish in the sea. All you need to do is learn how to fish. Don’t commit suicide, it just proves that you’re weak and they won. Talk to someone; get those pent-up emotions out in the open. Get a hold in yourself. Despite the sheer loneliness and hopelessness, you can manage to survive these feelings as time passes by. So, suicide… Bad idea.
2. Eliminate any Contact
Probably the stupidest thing you could ever do after a bad break up is getting back together. If you think you deserved more than what your partner gave you, then you probably are. Delete their number, delete them from Facebook and Twitter, stay away from their usual hangouts, and ignore them. By consciously keeping these people away from you, it is much easier to move on. Also, you might want to get rid of their things in your apartment. First, there’s probably too much stuff and second, you want to get rid of things that remind you of them. In short, out with the old and moving on to something new.
3. Don’t watch the Notebook
We all know how Allie has Alzheimer’s and Noah makes her fall in love with her everyday. I know its romantic, but please, you just got out of a bad relationship. The last thing you want to do is to remember the good times you had and get back in that relationship, and can you really handle all the crying? Enough is enough. Life isn’t based on a novel. Get real and face your reality. There are many aspects in your life that you can seek pleasure from.
4. Get a Hobby
Hobbies are fun. You don’t have to be collecting stamps or insects to have a hobby. You could play a sport; buy a new video game, read best seller books and etc. This way, you could take your mind off things and enjoy other things in life and stop moping over your past relationship. This way, you’re gradually getting your life back on track.
5. Go to Parties
It is not bad to go to parties every now and then. The thought of drinking and partying all night sounds like a lot of fun. Get drunk and crazy; you need some happy vibes right now. At some point, you need to fuel up your endorphins and let go of those negative feelings. Tell yourself that things will get better and better.
6. Don’t be Afraid to Go on Dates
Remember that you are now single, and you might just want to mingle. Going on dates doesn’t mean you have to have a relationship with them. This is just a great way for you to meet new people and remember how it was like to be single. Although, your game might be a little rusty and this is a great way to polish them up. Don’t worry about the three month rule, it’s not real.
I can not tell you how fast you can move on. That really just depends on you. But with the right mindset and tools, it could certainly be a lot faster. Hence, if you do decide to go into another relationship, don’t jump right in. Take it slow and take your time.