Altar Boy… at 27

1. He was 26 when I met him and he let his parents control him and tell him what he could and couldn’t do. We rented a hotel for a night while attending my friend’s wedding, and his parents called a million times during the night (while we were sleeping) to “check on him”.”

They then went to my friend’s mom’s house at 2 am (after stealing the directions from his car earlier without my knowledge) claiming they didn’t know where he was and were worried. And called the police to report him missing. All because I didn’t want to spend the night at his parent’s house, because I knew how controlling and awkward they would have been.

2. I had to teach him about sex and female anatomy because not only was he a virgin when we met, but he grew up Catholic and went to a private middle school and they don’t teach sex-ed. Somehow with the abundance of information on the internet, he did not know anything about the reproductive system on males or females, let alone about how to use a condom properly.

3. Despite priding himself on being a romantic, he failed to be so on both my birthday and Valentine’s day. I am not unreasonable. A dinner and a movie would have been nice for either occasion. On Valentine’s Day, he bought me a rug. On my birthday he came to pick me up from work, and when I asked where we were going he had no idea what I was talking about. My co-worker had to convince him that taking me out to dinner on my birthday was a good idea.