Dog Survived. His Dignity Didn’t.

1. When I first met him he said he was staying with a roomate at an apartment, but I never went inside because he wanted to stay at my place 24/7. I later found out he was homeless.

2. I was dancing with my gay friend and he got so jealous that he attempted to commit suicide by driving on my prescription pills. He got in the car and crashed, rolling over onto my dog, nearly killing her.

3. After I dumped his ass the next day, I saw him at a bar and he tried to get me to go home with him. Too bad he was so drunk he vomited on himself.