The science of attraction permeates every aspect of the universe. Attraction is a fundamental universal force that binds things in the universe together. It is a potent force if you let it work for your benefit. Stresses in relationship may sometimes convince you that there exists a powerful force repelling you from your partner. However, this pseudo-force has neither the power or grounding in reality as such.
Relationship troubles begin when forces of attraction between your partner and you weaken. Not only that, your attraction towards other things overshadow your attraction towards your mate. This thing can happen the other way around too. In other words, your partner’s sense of attraction towards you weakens.
This article illuminates several effective ways through which you can strengthen your feelings of attraction towards your partner, and vice versa. Without a doubt, these methods will serve you and take your love life to a whole new level.
15 Ways to Use the Science of Attraction
The methods, which you’ll read about shortly, are based on scientific principles of attraction that is deeply rooted in neuroscience. In other words, the three parts of the brain, namely the reptilian, mammalian, and human brain, along with the sense of sight, hearing, touch, smell, and taste, hold the key to mastering the science of attraction.
Let’s look at these methods now.
1. Enhance Your Self Image
The brain consists of three parts, the reptilian, the mammalian, and the human brain. According this system of classification, called the triune brain, which physician and neuroscientist Paul D Maclean proposed, the human brain allows homo sapiens to develop a sense of “self.”
Every individual’s sense of self consists of a complex system of rules, most of which we’re not consciously aware of, based on which the individual relates to the environment. However, a lot of people create rules that take the form of limiting beliefs about themselves.
For example, the mental rule “I am not worthy of love” cuts you off from experiencing love. As a result, you feel unloved even when you are surrounded by people who love and care for you.
The good news is that you can re-program yourself using the power of positive self-talk and visualization. To learn more about these techniques, read the books What to Say When You Talk to Yourself by Dr. Shad Helmstetter and Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz.
2. Embrace Physical Culture
Among your five sense organs, the sense of sight is the most efficient way of gathering information about the surroundings. Therefore, the importance of looking good cannot be overemphasized. Your clothes, accessories, make up, and cosmetic products, such as anti-aging, restoration, and special care products from Skinception, does add tremendous value to your physical appearance. You can boost your sex appeal even further by developing a fit, healthy, strong, flexible, and resilient body.
No matter how out of shape you are today, you can use the body-weight-only exercise techniques explained in the book Convict Conditioning by Paul Wade, to achieve astonishing improvements in the look and feel of your body within a year’s time. Remember, you’re on a journey to manifest the best version of your body. So, don’t compare yourself with others. Instead, encourage yourself to feel good even if you do just one more pushup than you could do yesterday.
3. Train Your Active Listening Skills
People have underestimated the role that listening skills play in the science of physical attraction. On the other hand, people have overemphasized the role of speaking skills in the science of human attraction. For instance, you’re asked to be a smooth talker, who delivers well-rehearsed pickup line followed by enchanting narratives of glorious exploits and adventures.
But, sooner or later the scripts will run out and you’ll have to “wing it.” When this happens, you feel like you’re stuck in the cockpit of a crashing fighter plane and you can’t find the eject button. Listening, however, doesn’t suffer from this shortcoming. There is no end to how much you can listen to someone, unless you run out of patience or tolerance.
According to scientific research published by International Coach Academy When most people listen, they quickly slip into “daydream” mode and tune the speaker out or they become engrossed in an internal struggle to cope with new information presented by the speaker. In both such situations, the speaker’s intent and emotion is barely understood by the listener and an opportunity for the listener and speaker is lost.
By focusing your attention on what the speaker says and suspending your judgment for the time being, you begin to listen actively. An active listener enables the speaker to express themselves fully and experience acceptance, an extremely rare commodity in today’s world. As a result, people begin to gravitate to active listeners, because they are attracted to their attentiveness.
4. Cultivate the “Go Giver” Attitude
In his bestselling book The Go-Giver, author Bob Burg wrote, “Your influence is determined by how abundantly you place other people’s interests first.” If you are self-centered and focused inwardly, you will have little or no influence over others. Your attractive pull would be weak, indeed.
To reinvigorate your attraction, pay attention to your partner’s needs, as well as your own. Thereafter, orient your actions towards meeting not only your needs, but also your partners. Extend this philosophy to all people you are in contact with. Soon, you will see that your needs are taken care of without any efforts on your part because people around you address those needs for you.
This leaves plenty of room for you to cater to the needs of more people, expanding your influence in the process. Usually, within a few months, you become a whirlpool of positive attraction.
5. Explore and Expand Methods of Communication
Have you ever felt lost for words when your partner earnestly shares troubles, problems and woes? You want to make your partner feel better, but the right words seem out of your reach. Sometimes, your attempts become counterproductive, making matters worse. This is why you shouldn’t limit yourself to verbal communication alone. You can comfort your partner by communicating using other channels of sense perception, such as sense, touch, smell, and taste.
For instance, the next time your find yourself struggling to string soothing words together, just give your partner a warm comforting hug, caress your partners skin and scalp, or cuddle up on the couch or bed. Remember, only your creativity and imagination limits the number of ways you can use the sense of touch to convey feelings of love and care. In the same manner, you can employ other senses to carry your messages of affection to your partner.
6. Encourage Performance and Roll Out Rewards
A man is biologically engineered to function as a part of a community. Social structures, such as marriage and friendship, enable an individuals to merge their efforts with the collective whole. The intensity of the effort depends on the level of encouragement the individuals receive from their social environment.
The science of attraction allows an individual to capitalize on the social nature of human beings and build communities around themselves. The attractive pull of such individuals hold the members of their community together, just as the gravity of the sun holds the planets of the solar system in orbit.
An effective way to get people to organize around you is to elicit performance from people around you through motivation, inspiration, coaching and feedback. In addition to this, you must have a clear plan to reward accomplishments.
7. Build Tolerance and Patience
The I-need-it-yesterday culture is a towering menace that blocks the way to stratospheric success in any regard. If you’re intent on forging a magnificent field of attraction, situations that test your determination are bound to appear. Other people in your life may not be as receptive to changes as you are, leading to frequent complains, sabotaging behavior, and manipulative actions from their part.
During such times, it is important that you remain non-reactive and stay the course. To do this, you need to build tolerance and patience. An effective way to do this is to create a clear mental picture of success and use visualizing techniques to etch the image in your mind. If the end game is always within you site, external forces won’t succeed in derailing your effort.
8. Create a Loving Ecosystem
The environment in which you and your partner spend time together influences the strength of attraction. For instance, a cozy fireplace is the perfect setting for a wonderful evening spent in intimate embrace. A comfortable bed placed in a nicely decorated room gently lit by the soft light shining from dim lights cause sexual arousal, leading to satisfying intercourse.
Pictures displayed prominently on the walls of your living room, tell your story about how you and your partner have shaped a family life together and make your relationship stronger. There are numerous ways in which your environment can inspire mutual attraction.
9. Share Time, The Most Precious Gift
The Talmud describes making another person wait as the worst crime a person can commit because there is no way a man can give back the lost time. Business managers consider time the most important resource because you can make more money, or hire more people, but you can never make more time than there already is. Thus, time is the most precious thing you can share with people.
If you are generously share your time with others, those you share it with will value your contribution and reciprocate your gesture. Hence, to become an attractive person, you must learn to manage your time and handle your priorities. Books, such as How to Be a Productivity Ninja and The Morning Miracle, explains excellent strategies to enrich the quality of your life by learning to manage your time.
10. Catalyze Your Sexual Chemistry
The science of attraction documentary, featured on Netflix – search for “science of attraction Netflix” to access this video series – explains the relationship between sex and the science of attraction from a scientific perspective. According to the documentary, sexual intercourse triggers the release of dopamine, the pleasure causing hormone. The feeling of elation, often described as a high, can be addictive. That’s why it is important to maintain a healthy sex life in your relationship.
Unfortunately, sex becomes increasingly less exciting if you allow monotony to set in. That’s why you must actively try new positions, locations, and time of the day, to keep things fresh. Additionally, for men there are sprays, such as Nexus Pheromones, imbued with chemicals called pheromones that strengthen their seductive allure using the science of love.
11. On the Court and on the Stand
At times, serving your partner well requires you to actively participate in your partner’s life. During other times, you do your partner a great disservice by refusing to let your partner operate alone. The key to building a loving relationship is to know when to step in and when to step out. Operating at this level of sensitivity is difficult, but rewarding, and requires a trial and error approach.
In this regard, you can utilize a critical component of the biology of attraction – pattern recognition. Humans are creatures of habit and close observation of these habits reveal patterns. For example, even when your partner seems to get upset over a million different things, when you pierce the veil of superficiality, the core of what truly upsets your partner is often the same.
The principle extends to occasions when your partner is extremely pleased with you. Therefore, identifying the mental constructs within which your partner functions grants you helpful insights. You can use these revelations to further develop your magnetic pull.
12. Share Praises Publicly and Criticism Privately
Wouldn’t the world be a marvelous place if people whispered criticism and announced praises? Unfortunately, we see more of the opposite. People are quite vocal when conveying displeasure, but they convey words of gratitude, encouragement, love, affection, and care in hushed voices.
Since you’re in the process of crafting a magnetic personality, you need to break conformity. Be the kind of person who shines the spotlight on the pleasant aspects of another’s personality, prominently showcasing these positive qualities for everyone to see. On the contrary, if you want to draw a person’s attention towards something that’s not pleasant, then do so discretely.
13. Celebrate Victories
Who you are, what you do, or where you come from doesn’t matter. Everyone wants appreciation and is starves for it. A few congratulatory words or a pat in the back adds to the self-esteem of others, leaving them highly appreciative of your considerate nature; however, occasionally, you must step it up and celebrate your partner’s success. While doing so, involve other people in the celebration, so that more people know about your partner’s recent victory.
Presenting a token to mark the celebration offers a way to establish the event in your timeline, allowing you and your partner to revisit these triumphs to draw inspiration for bold action or cherish a treasurable moment.
14. Bring Humor and Laughter Into Your Relationship
Jay Leno said you can’t stay mad at somebody who makes you laugh. Scientists report that the psychology of attraction based on laughter hinges on the release of feel good chemicals, such as endorphins, serotonin and oxytocin. These chemicals induce an overall sense of well-being. Naturally, if you can make people laugh, they feel good being around you.
If you are not born funny, don’t worry, you can watch comedy shows on TV with your partner regularly. Your partner will love the attention, appreciate that you’re spending time with her, and receive a healthy boost in libido along the way. Humor does deliver some serious benefits.
15. Put in the Time and Do the Work
Abraham Lincoln said, “I walk slowly, but I never walk backwards.” Most people get excited about applying new techniques and strategies and their initial days of practice yield impressive results. As the days goes by, the novelty of these ideas wear away and so does the enthusiasm of the practitioners. Sadly, this leaves people far from their target goal and they are quick to deliver the verdict, “This methods doesn’t work.”
To avoid burning out this way, you must work on one idea at a time. Give yourself two to three weeks to internalize each method. During the first couple of months you may feel you’re not making any progress, but if you stick with it, you’ll begin to see an increase in your attractiveness.
Solomon, the wise king from biblical times, wore a ring with an inscription that read, “This too shall pass.” This is true for the good times and the bad. So when things are bright and sunny, make the most of it. When things turn dark and gloomy, don’t despair or lose hope.
The science of attraction does not make you invulnerable to the so called “bad times,” but the principles here may enable you to deal with such situations with grace and poise. Consequently, your relationship may become even deeper and more joyous.